craplos:

ladies. be careful when u wear spaghetti straps. it might distract the boys. they’ll start thinking of spaghetti. they will get hungry. they will stop at nothing to get their spaghetti.

dorkstrider:

[puts arm around ur shoulder] stick with me kid. you’ll get at least 20 notes on all your selfies

1atula:

elsenliberator:

Pros to naming your future child “Yeehaw”:

• You get to have a kid named fucking Yeehaw

Cons:

• absolutely no drawbacks name your kid Yeehaw

also a pro: being able to angrily yell yeehaw at the top of your lungs in public places whenever your child misbehaves

(Source: harajukusparklejumpropequeen)

vvaddles:

theselener:

vvaddles:

would u rather eat a pound of bricks or a matter baby??

whats a matter baby

nothing sweetie whats a matter with you??

orlandobloomers:

wanna know how punk i am??????

*punches a wall*

drive me to the hospital

(Source: casualmalexlfan)

fasterfood:

if my name was simon i would just write “simon says give me an A” on top of every test i took in school and the teachers would all laugh so much they would give me a 100 every time

cracked:

Actually, I feel like you could probably say more.

carcinogenocider:

words that have become part of my regular vocabulary

• dang
• holla
• gomen
• thank

words i did not want to become part of my regular vocabulary

• dang
• holla
• gomen
• thank

(Source: elasticitymudflap)

phleps:

real picture of me trying to stand up for my friends

strifeandslash:

whoa bet u never made these connections before…really makes u think huh?